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The Beauty of ‘The Incomplete’

We give such high importance to COMPLETION

Completion of a task, a project, a process, a relation

Why the thrust on completion?

Don’t you agree

A poem reads well even if the last verse is still in the poet’s mind

Only the chef knows that the mustard in the recipe is missing

A designer sulks about a small motif that looks out of place

A painter knows that the orange should have been darker

The runner knows that he finished 30 seconds later than yesterday

The entrepreneur knows that his actual profit target was 20% higher

Only the homemaker knows that there are some clothes that are soiled and creased

Let us delve a little deeper

Incomplete love is more intense than a perfect love story

The half-moon looks as calm as the full moon

A bud is as delicately beautiful as a fully bloomed-flower

The Sun spreads light even when hidden behind the clouds

A rainbow looks as pretty in a little glimpse as in seeing it end to end

The truth is that the incomplete in our life is complete for the world outside. If we sum up all that is incomplete, we will understand how good life has been to us.

Does that mean that we should leave things halfway?

NO

It simply means that we should learn to celebrate the incomplete as much as we rejoice for the COMPLETE in our lives because life happens in the journey, not at the destination.

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5 Simple Steps to Tame the Anxious Mind

I had a long day ahead. The to-do list looked longer than the day. What did the list include? Work, family, health and passion. Some of the items in the list were for the world and a little some that mattered to me.

It felt strangely overwhelming despite knowing that I have the entire day at my disposal.

Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Read on to know how I tamed my anxious mind –

Step 1 – I took a few deep breathes and decided to bring my concentration back to the moment. Once, I was present in the NOW I felt motivated to start.

Step 2 – I shortlisted 3 tasks that would make me feel accomplished at the end of the day. The rest of the activities were important but I had to prioritize.

Step 3 – I started with one major task in the morning itself. Do the difficult one first and you breathe easy all day long.

Step 4 – I asked for support wherever possible. My statements were clear and precise with no ambiguity in the form of help that I needed.

Step 5 – I took breaks in between two tasks where I engaged in real conversations with people, reading and meditating.

Ta-da! I could attend to two of my major tasks, well before noon and the entire list looked easily doable in the remaining time.

Do you know what I did?

I expanded my concept of time. Rather than considering time as the limiting factor, I chose to make it my strength. Always think in abundance and keep telling yourself – ‘I have enough time and energy.’

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9 Powerful Tips to Help You Develop the Courage to Pursue

He was born in an educated and cultured family. After completing his education in Delhi, he moved eastwards to Kolkata for his first job at Shaw Wallace and later at a shipping firm Bird and Co. But, at the age of 26, he decided to stop earning for livelihood and took a courageous decision of pursuing his dream – ‘He wanted to act on the big screen!!’

While Bollywood is known to run by nepotism, this superstar made his struggle count and today the world looks up to him. He is none other than the respected Mr. Amitabh Bachchan!

What we see today is the glitz and glamour but, the real star emerged after 12 flops over a span of 5 years. Now, this is what we call COURAGE.

How can you develop the courage to pursue your dreams?

– Continuous improvement in knowledge and skills in your field, makes you more confident.

– Share your goals with people, who encourage you. Avoid people who are critical of new ideas.

– Keep patience till the right opportunity comes.

– Take some time to internalize failures and get back to work. Don’t let it stop you.

– Do not succumb to peer pressure. Remember, you are doing it for reaching your optimum.

– Make sure that you earn enough to support day to day expenses and also keep saving some money. This is so that, you don’t have to give up your dream abruptly due to financial crisis.

– Try to fund your own interests. This gives you mental and emotional freedom.

– Work distraction-free. Time is the most precious when trying to imagine/build/create.

– Be genuine and don’t try to create a false image.

On the arduous journey of making your dreams come true, you will come across two big hurdles. First, a question – “What will people think and say?” Facing this question requires maximum courage. Second, self-doubt which requires trusting your capabilities.

Once you have overcome these, the world is yours.

In the words of Mr. Bachchan – “You can’t skip struggle. Better, accept it.”

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3 Easy Ways To Adopt A Sustainable Lifestyle

Are we seeing a change in the culture of India? Zero waste weddings, dedicated cycle tracks, no vehicle zones, celebrities supporting mindful fashion? Sustainable living is the latest trend and I am glad that the society is fast catching up.

Living sustainably is a choice. The transformation from consumerism to sustainability is gradual and beautiful. Why beautiful?

Because it places power in your hands. The power to find more in less. Following are some simple ways by which common people can easily adopt a sustainable lifestyle –

Repeat

Alia Bhatt repeated her wedding outfit and the impact on commoners was phenomenal. When celebrities promote an idea, the message hits different. If we do a similar act, the influence will be on a smaller group but will definitely lead to a stir. The real difference is, in how comfortably and confidently you repeat.

Repair

The Japanese follow Kintsugi, a practice where they mend the broken ceramics by fixing the cracks with gold. In Indian culture also, the idea of repair and reuse is not new. In the last few years, with fast fashion and social media intimidation, the privileged section may have lost the patience to mend, but a larger group still believes in maintaining the old. Not disposing things for the smallest of the reasons is the easiest way to begin living sustainably.

Value experiences

If you analyze closely, most of your shopping is driven by impulse. Good offers, social media trends, the displays and pop ups. The root of sustainable living lies in finding joy in experiences and not possessions. Be it a celebration or an achievement, keep your focus more on living the moment rather than on decking up for the event.

Sustainable living is a habit that can be consciously developed. An important thing to keep in mind is to internalize the habit by not being boastful about it. It is a modern, subtle choice that one makes for self. If others find it inspiring its good else one can continue for self-sake.

Trust me, living sustainably gives you a super feeling because the lack disappears and all that remains is just ENOUGH.

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5 Ways to Build a Happy Team

An organization that is successful in creating an enthusiastic team is poised for organic growth. We were exposed to the idea of team work in our early schooling years, when we were given group projects. Professional education also lays emphasis on working in teams.

What makes a team work? What binds them in an unmatchable spirit to do the best? What leads them to believing that their team work will ultimately culminate into organization growth? Here are a few points that can be of help in developing a healthy team culture –

Define clear work flow

The timeline has to be specific and there should be absolute clarity in roles. Research, designing, content, presentation, proposition and other elements should be clearly allotted with a deadline. While doing this all the team members should be involved so that the outline receives better acceptance. This also improves the proactiveness of the individual members.

Avoid small talk

Stereotyping and gossiping are detrimental to the health of the team. You may think that the person does not know, but the vibe catches faster than words. Do not speak that, which you cannot say in the face. Choose your words wisely and do not let negative communication spread.

Trust the process

Don’t be too quick to opinionate on the others methods. Every person works the best, in their own form. You try to be interfering and you harm the spirit. Be concerned only with the outcome and as far as the process goes, just trust and accept.

Continuous re-evaluation

As a team you have designed a strategy and you all are working by it. Now, you notice some flaws. In such a scenario please re-evaluate the plan of action. Shying away from it will only complicate and lead to an indefinite blame game within the team.

Take time out to enjoy

This is personal choice but you definitely bond better over coffee or a drink. However, the moment also becomes perfect for useless banter so, make sure you keep the exchange positive. Explore the non-work side of each other during such times.

Yes, you feel you work best when alone but, the world does not work this way. Make an effort not to be the best in the team but to be a happy team player.

#teamwork #teamplayer #teamspirit

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A story of how Kumar Mangalam Birla balanced the new and old

Life is all about creating a balance. If you observe closely, you constantly balance, expectations and reality, conflicts and camaraderie, hopes and disappointments, old and modern. Creating a balance is a vital skill of life. The more adept you are at this, the better is your progress. Let us learn more about this with an example of Kumar Mangalam Birla, Chairman, Aditya Birla Group (ABG).  

Honored with the Padma Bhushan in January 2023, Kumar Mangalam Birla’s success story is inspirational on many levels. But in this article, we will only explore how he created a BALANCE.

Kumar Mangalam Birla assumed leadership at the young age of 28, after the death of his father Mr. Aditya Birla.

He inherited a successful business, being run in a closed traditional Marwari setup. A mark of the system was that positions were naturally filled by the children of the older employees, irrespective of their abilities. Kumar Birla recognized the inadequacy of this system, and embarked upon the arduous journey of developing a system based on meritocracy.

Do you think it was an easy task for him?

It is difficult to explain the need for professionalism when the business is already well-established. But being a visionary, Kumar Birla had gauged that he had to bring about this change. He hired managers from multinational companies, putting an end to the tradition of employing ageing staff.

A retirement age of 60 was set. The group explained it in detail and made sure that it was not sprung as a surprise, with those close to retirement getting a two-year grace period and some extra cash.

He infused fresh blood into the group, but also retained many seniors such as Askaran Agarwala and Dwarka Das Rathi, who continued to lead group companies.

One of the key roles created by Kumar Birla was that of people who would determine strategy and today ABG is a multinational conglomerate with presence in 36 nations and a combined annual revenue of $65 billion, over 50% of which is derived from its overseas operations

Kumar Birla says: “Very often people get so caught up in running the businesses that they have no time left for spotting opportunities.”

Have you been postponing an important change in your personal or professional life for the fear of IMBALANCE?

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Resolutions are overrated

This new year I have made no resolutions. I am in complete acceptance of my current state. Yes, I do wish to achieve but I don’t need resolutions to determine my genuineness. I took 1st January as easily as I took the period from 25th – 31st December. After all what changes in a night.

The start of the year has definitely filled me with a renewed zeal and I am loving the vibe of good change that surrounds me. My sleepyhead friend is jogging at 7 am, my mother in law ate a fruit platter first thing in the morning, my sister has kept a book by her bedside, a friend has enrolled for dance class… yes, they have all resolved.

I am happy for them, but this year for a change I have made no resolutions. Starting 1st Jan, I have only become mindful of my thoughts and actions. The agenda is simple

  1. Judge less, connect more
  2. Keep only ONE important task in a day
  3. Break free from set comfort zones
  4. Uphold your choices
  5. Be in the flow

Do the above read like resolutions? No. Because they are loosely stated giving me ample room to err. As long as I am there most of the times, I am happy. I don’t want my resolve to choke me.

I am not sure as to how many of my readers will agree with me, but I have chosen my course.

I believe that water is an epitome of natural beauty when it flows in the form of a river and the same water becomes one of the resources when it flows in contained steel pipes. I want my resolve to be free flowing and remember, even then, there is momentum, there is progress, there is happiness…

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Be Kind to Yourself

Today as I sipped on my morning tea I heard a voice in my head – “Be kind to yourself.” Amidst targets, responsibilities and the ticking clock, this thought felt empowering. We often expect kindness from others, and end up getting disappointed. We then, enter the emotional tornado where we list everything we did for others and express remorse over how little we got in return. The sad part is that others don’t even realize what you are going through.

The result is, the ‘doing’ that should have uplifted you, brings you down.

How about being kind to self and not seeking it outside?

Here are few ways to be gentler to yourself –

Take care of yourself – Your body is your medium to act. I was once diagnosed with acute calcification is my left hand. The cure was to use an immobilizer so that the muscle tear heals. My days and nights were horrid as I was able to do nothing. In that phase, I realized that I am nothing without my body. Eat well, sleep well, feed your mind with good stuff.

Follow the 3-priority rule – This rule is not by someone famous, rather it is from an 80-year-old woman Mrs. Vaidya, who stays in our complex. One day as I sat on the park bench feeling tired, she came to me and said, “Hi! How are you today. Where is the twinkle in your eye?” As we conversed, she explained, “If you want to do good in life, keep only 3 priorities in a day. Anything more than that strips you off your pleasantness.” Since then, her advice has stayed with me.

Know your journey – In a world of social media, you feel lost. Your possessions, vacations, achievements are underplayed constantly. It generates a ‘lack’ in your life. You see dreams that were never yours and you seek paths that you never wished to tread. Knowing that your journey is exclusively, uniquely yours is the most effective way of being kind to self.

Do special things for self – This thought itself makes me happy. Take a hot shower, cook your favorite meal, watch a series that you like, shop for yourself, go for a walk and many other things make you feel nice. We do it for friends and family with happiness, why leave oneself behind? Remember these are more relevant in difficult times. So do your best to incorporate some of these ways in your schedule on hard days.

Accept your failures – When you fail in life, you should take extra care of yourself. Failures have a domino effect that triggers our negative memory. We remember all that went wrong in the past or could go wrong in the future. In moments like these please do not abandon yourself or feel lost.Be compassionate to regain your calm at the earliest. Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend. Keep the dialogue same.

Forgive – You might be wondering how this is an act of self -compassion?  When you hold grudges, you obstruct your natural energy flow. You waste precious time in rumination. Once you choose to forgive, you release your mind and energy and you are kind to self.

Lower your expectations – Lesser your expectations, lesser will be your disappointments. Develop an attitude of not anticipating and you will protect your peace forever.

Be genuine – Every act of ingenuity is tantamount to self- betrayal. When you force yourself to be somebody, you lower your self-esteem. As against that every act of genuineness makes you stronger and allows you to be kind to your true self.

If I were to give one trait that can possibly cover all the above points, then it would be – ‘Emotional resilience.’ Build a protective wall around your mind and do not let anything enter, to disrupt your peace. No person or situation should have the power to be unkind to you. The moment such a thing happens, stand for yourself with firmness.

The sooner you internalize emotional resilience the better it is.

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Keep calm and be patient

For how long should I keep patience? This question itself shows your impatience. Of the many situations and factors that demand patience, I find two to be the most important  – 

  1. Self-Growth and
  2. People

In fact, if you look closely at your worries, you will find that each incident that bothers you falls under one of the above. Let us list some every day incidents that test our patience –” I am working hard, still I don’t have a steady flow of work”, “he is late always”, “Why do people honk on signals?”, “I am trying to learn AI but it is too demanding” and so on.

Big cities carry  a vibe of busyness. People’s minds are fragile. Small incidents trigger them and it has a trickle down effect on everything around.  

Here are 3 simple ways by which you can develop patience–

  1. Focus on your energies. Others have their own thoughts and priorities. If your schedule is permitting you to take that extra task in hand, just do it. This will help you honor your individual potential.
  2. If you are upset over something and feel like putting your point forth, wait for an extra 10 minutes before you speak. The gap allows you to choose your words and vibe. Many a times the situation gets dissolved in that span.
  3. Remember your circle of control and circle of influence. Know where you can bring a change for good. Everything else does not need your attention.

The rule is simple – Be patient and keep doing what you are good at. Your every act of patience can create a domino effect and inspire many others to behave the same way.

Let us stop looking at PATIENCE as a weakness or vulnerability. Let us celebrate and acknowledge every act of patience to create a new culture of easiness and accommodation.

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It’s Diwali!

Diwali is a celebration of homecoming. When Lord Rama, Maa Sita and Laxmanji returned from 14 years of exile, Ayodhya was fully lit with divas. Every lane was colorful, kids danced on the streets and the joy of the people knew no bound. Similar is the scene even today. Diwali carries with it a deep emotion of togetherness and new beginnings.

What is different is the reason of celebration? This festival gives us a chance to distance ourselves momentarily from the mundane chaos. It gives us time to ponder over what values do we really want in life. Every part of the celebration signifies cascading of the old and rebuilding of the new.

Diyas fight darkness and fill your heart with their golden light. When we look around, we notice what we already have in your life. This makes us feel content. A diya has a tiny flame but it glows in its own light, never asking for more.

The traditional sweets connect us to our ancestral legacy. When the family comes together to roll ladoos and make ghujiyaas, we experience the joy of hand labour. In the age of pace and technology, this practice slows us down and helps build patience.

When we meet and greet our loved ones, we know what real connection is. The pressure exerted by social media is released temporarily while we are engrossed in meaningful conversations.

Dressing up for Diwali helps you find a new beautiful you. The sheen of the silk dress, the grace of the gold jewelry, makes you feel elegant and special.

The rituals lead us to purification, by way of which we invoke Goddess Lakshmi to bestow upon us, the choiciest of her blessings. I firmly believe that the presence of money in life is important, to ensure that we are able to create and spread goodness.

With all of this an abstract aspect that I cherish on Diwali is considering this time to be auspicious to develop new thinking patterns. The newness of material possessions does not stay for long but a change in the thinking pattern, does help you upgrade. We all are victims of our own weak thoughts, which leads to anxiety and vulnerability. The outer world does not change, but it is our perspective that makes the difference.

Diwali is the ideal time to replace jealousy with appreciation, resistance with acceptance, anger with patience, anxiety with faith and FOMO with JOMO.

It is necessary to understand the significance of the REAL. It is important to internalize the good that you have done as you celebrated and not put everything on display through pictures and posts. What is internalized stays with you, what is over exposed fades away. Let us work on internalizing the positive emotions to build a newer better world.