Category: Lifestyle and personal growth

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The Slingshot Ride!

We visited an amusement park. As much as the huge, fancy rides excited me, they also led to a pit in my stomach. I was on the fence because, yes, I am fearless, but I have not done this in years. Will I be able to handle the adrenaline rush?

While I did smaller roller coasters and swings, a heavily promoted ‘Slingshot’ ride, placed right in the centre like a solitaire on the queen’s crown, kept attracting my attention.

I was watching the demeanour of those waiting in the queue in awe, and I was trying to catch a glimpse of those who were coming out after having done the ride, to check whether they were OK.

All this time, my mind kept telling me, “This is not for you. Forget it.” But the heart said, “If not now, then when? You want to bungee jump and skydive, and here you are, scared of a ride in an amusement park. C’mon, you should do it.”

My friend wanted to do it, so I accompanied her, thinking to myself, “I will see her board and move towards the exit.” She told me, “Why are you wasting your time? I will meet you ahead.” I said, “Never mind, I want to see the ride up and close.”

We reached the end of the queue. They were allowing five people inside at a time. The attendant released the chain. I hesitated, but she, unaware of my intentions, pointed towards the queue and made a strong gesture asking me to hurry.

Once inside, I was the first one in line to board the ride. The irritated attendant, again oblivious to my lostness, gestured that I should board faster. Suddenly, something changed inside me, and my feet were drawn towards the ride.

I sat, the other four sat, the dramatic countdown began, the ride started, and we were shot in the sling. The ride lasted less than a minute, but it changed me forever. Suddenly, the world became a possibility, because I lived my word of being fearless.

My call to everyone reading this is to try every new experience that comes your way. You never know what it has in store for you.

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Managing Negative Feelings with Intelligence

Feelings of anxiety, anger, loneliness, and jealousy have immense power to pull us back. Living these feelings constantly drains vital energy and hurts physical and mental well-being.

We all know 👆 but when faced with negative thoughts and feelings, we fail to act meaningfully.

It is common knowledge that anything grows when we feed it; the same applies here. When we constantly think, speak, and act out of these gloomy feelings we keep feeding them and they keep getting stronger.

Denial is not a solution because in a typical social setup dark thoughts and insecurities are bound to exist. The trick is to accept and outgrow.

Following are some simple ways to make these feelings starve –

– Specific gratitude

We are very specific about what is wrong in our lives. Similarly, we should express ‘specific gratitude’. For example; “I am grateful that my husband was available to take my daughter to her tournament so I could focus on work and finish it.”

– Avoid idleness

An idle mind nourishes negative feelings. It is often said that if currently, you have nothing to pursue, it is good to pursue yourself. Investing your time and intelligence in acquiring and applying knowledge leaves little or no room for negativity to creep in.

– Focus on your Karma

Stay focused on your deeds, responsibilities, and habits. Do good and don’t let the others affect you.

* Be humble and kind.

* Don’t engage in small talk.

* Don’t shy away from your responsibilities.

* Forgive and forget

Another important fact is that these feelings keep coming to you because of different situations.

The 👆 steps have to be repeated till they become your second nature. That’s how the feeding and growth cycle curbs and the feelings start dying.

Have you ever experienced 👆? If yes, please share in the comments section and make this exchange more valuable.

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The Theory of Drama

The Theory of Drama in Life

The good, the bad, the calm, and the chaos.

We share the chaos aloud while the calm feels ignored.

An accident, a delay, a spillage, or a failure.

We shout, cry, and make ourselves heard.

We share and relive the bitterness again and again.

And then we have the small progress and the little improvements

We keep it to ourselves and forget it the next day.

We don’t share or bask in the glory.

Why such a divided view of the good and bad?

Because bad means drama and good means peace.

And we all love drama!

Walk away from the drama and the good will be felt, heard, and seen.

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Happiness is a Mindset

Happiness leaves no scars, hence it is easy to forget.

The human mind finds meaning in problems and negativity. The moment you drive it towards positivity and happiness it throws the following words at you –

– You are foolish

– You are so innocent

– You are vulnerable

– You are weak

– You do not accept the reality…

It systematically challenges your positivity. And you fall into the trap and start acting otherwise.

Whenever these thoughts come in to bother you, reiterate and tell yourself

– I want to do my best no matter what

– I want to give unconditionally

– I want to forgive and let go

– I want to live fully and freely

– I am secure and no one can take advantage of me

Fight the battle with strength and soon the negative pattern will cease to exist paving the way for foolish optimism (as they call it). But don’t you think it is better than energy-draining pessimism?

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Know How Humble You Are!

Humility is a superpower!

Check how humble you are by answering the following 5 questions –

1. Do you mention how you contribute to the team or spend your day without being asked?

If the answer to this is yes, you are not humble. You may argue that you are just narrating facts, but the reality is that you are superimposing yourself on the other by glorifying your ways.

2. Do you always feel extra pressure in team/group projects and presentations?

If yes, it means you lack humility. If you self-analyze you will realize that you feel the pressure more because you consider yourself above others and doubt their abilities.

3. Do you micromanage intentionally or unintentionally?

If yes, it means you are far from being humble. Micromanaging is not for the good of the project or others in the team, it is because you consider your ways superior.

4. Do you always find a negative in the other person?

If yes, then you need help with humility. When you always find a negative in the other, it implies that by mentioning the negative you want to establish your supremacy over the other.

5. Do you use a lot of ‘I’ in your conversations?

If yes, then consider it as a subtle sign to recheck how humble you are. When discussing your day with your spouse or a friend if you throw a lot of ‘I’s’ like – I did this, I did that, I thought about it, I faced it, and so on, it means you are self-obsessed with your ways.

The opposite of humility is not pride, it is stagnation because humility means growth.

I hope the above questions will steer your mind towards humility, an important virtue!

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It’s Time We Judge a Woman in the Light of Her Beautiful Dreams

A messy home = A messy woman

👆 our society believes.

But if you closely observe a messy home indicates that the woman of the house is pursuing her dreams.

She prioritizes and takes the important energy-consuming tasks first, followed by routine house chores that can be done in autopilot mode. Till then the house lies as it is.

She is designing a new product or has joined a new team, and she cannot cook new delicacies every day. The commitments demand time and once she settles she will cook your favourites.

She is feeling weak and wants to devote some time to her health, and she prefers not to do laundry every day. Exercise needs consistency and soon she will make it a habit.

She is connecting with new clients to promote her venture and has little time to socialize. Soon she will have a set clientele and will have the time to meet and greet happily.

She is pressed for time and expecting a hand with housework. The day she is easy, she takes up extra cleaning and sourcing.

She had a long day and needs rest. The next day morning she will be full of energy and balance everything.

We need to understand that there is a reason why she is unavailable. We need to appreciate that she is dreaming, aspiring, and building.

A messy home = An ambitious woman

P.S. – She cannot visualize her growth in her children and spouse because she has her independent calibre.

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How to Make Your Work Speak

Do you feel that you don’t get the credit that you deserve?

Living out of a state of constant regret is not a good thing. The feeling is depressing, and it keeps pulling you down.

You may be thinking – “I know that. But what can I do? Every time I can’t keep mentioning what I did for the project. It is for the others to understand.”

I agree that keeping your work ‘high-key’ is not a good approach either.

While this an intense topic, here are a few things you can do to handle this issue –

  • In project meetings, share your views with confidence. It indirectly implies that you have done your homework.

  • You can try giving a brief overview to your senior (in case he does not know) of your contribution. Remember, it is professional, not impolite.

  •  If you are working on a particular part of the project, try to see it through to completion. Even if you require technical assistance, ensure that the final result is as planned, which means you have done your job thoroughly.

  • Do not discuss it bitterly with colleagues and family. Remember, it never helps and only increases the resentment.

  • Do not keep feeding the feeling. The more you think about it, the more vulnerable you become. It assumes its worst form when you fail to distinguish between real and imaginary. You feel ignored and unnoticed every time, even if the reality is different.

The feeling of being unnoticed is a highly internalized emotion that acts as a slow poison and empties you from the inside.

It is wise to accept the situation and take the above steps to improve the situation. It is also a good idea to shift focus on areas where you excel.

As you transcend from acceptance to improvement, be calm. Haphazard efforts will create chaos and make you look like some desperate attention seeker.

Always keep in mind – Let your work speak!

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A Simple Effective Way to Deal with Delays

Punctuality is not about being on time but about respecting your commitments 🕒

Punctuality is not for others; it is for you.

How do you deal with a situation where you are punctual but others are not?

A natural response is irritation because you feel like a fool as you scheduled and planned your exit to arrive on time, and it was not a coincidence.

Here is how you can deal with it 👇

– Do not spoil your temperament (remember you made it on time 👏 )

– Communicate to others that you do not appreciate delays

– And move on without carrying baggage

The longer you keep the thought in your head, the longer you will take to start functioning optimally.

In moments like these, remind yourself that the purpose of the meeting is higher than these petty issues.

Punctuality is the key to dependability, and it hurts when others fail to show up, but you have no control over it.

You may get confused and lower your time standards, but it will leave you feeling worse because it is not your inherent nature.

Take pride in your habit and stick to it, no matter what, but don’t let the habit change you into an ever-irritable, complaining person.

Another important thing is that the world learns enough by example, so don’t waste your time preaching punctuality. 

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One Important Thing to Learn From the Paris Olympic Athletes

Consistency is the buzzword at the Paris Olympics 2024. Every athlete from anywhere in the world owes their success to the persistent hours when, they practised alone, with no one to watch, acknowledge, or support.

Just like the athletes, each one of us has a dream to be an improved person—we seek improvement in terms of health, knowledge, emotional intelligence, skill set, and other attributes.

Reading, meditating, learning, and similar self-development activities feature in almost every person’s to-do list, but you seldom put a tick beside them.

You realize that these activities are non-urgent but important.

And due to procrastination, lethargy, distractions, and busyness, you fail to devote time to them.

After a few months, you stop trying to pursue, and after a few years, you give up completely, and they don’t show in your to-do anymore.

But imagine the situation where you would have worked on those tasks!

You would have been a different person today!

By working consistently on self-growth, you become a different person. You acquire a personality where you are more confident and accomplished.

How do you move from giving up to taking up self-growth tasks?

Here is a 7-step method –

1. Set small goals daily

2. Fight hard against your moods, and make sure to start

3. Once you have started, ensure you spend minimal focused time on the task

4. Before you end, compare how you fared as against yesterday

5. If you were on par, be happy that you maintained the level

6. If you were better, feel proud of the progress

7. If you were poor, try giving some more time, such that you match the previous level

The last point looks senselessly pushy but makes all the difference.

You have to tell your mind that you are not engaging in its stupid games, and you will continue to pursue come what may.

You have to show your mind that you are stronger than it.

Soon, you train your mind, and it stops tampering and interfering, and that’s when you share your stories of consistency with others, just like the Olympic athletes.

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Inhale and Exhale – An Easy Way to Lead You Out of Difficult Situations

I practice yoga every day. Saurabh Bhotra, the co-founder of Habuild, said in one of his sessions – “Your breath is the bridge between the outer world and the inner world.”

I tried following it, and yes, it works miraculously.

Whenever –

– You are overwhelmed due to work

– You are in a space of stress

– You have met with an untoward incident or

– You are facing a life-and-death situation

Your mind is in complete chaos, and you want to grab, hold on, hoping that someone will help.

But the current world scenario is such that everyone has some s–t to handle.

In such difficult situations that are common, bring the control back into life by breathing deeply.

Inhale and exhale. What does it do?

– It energizes your weary soul and tired mind

– It distracts you from emotions like anger and remorse, considered normal on rough days

– It keeps you from futile discussions that provide temporary relief

– It restores faith in the future

Let us delve into a little bit of science.

According to the Yale School of Medicine, our body has a vagus nerve that starts from the base of our brain and reaches the other organs.

In stress situations, this nerve gets activated reflexively, which increases our blood flow and prepares our body for quick protective action. It triggers the fight-or-flight response.

However, scientific observation of the diaphragm proves that the vagus nerve can be reset by deep breathing.

Slow, even breaths that originate deep within the abdomen stimulate the vagus nerve in a way that signals safety and cues our bodies and minds to relax, restore, and release chronic patterns.

I did not wish to give a lengthy post/article on managing stress.

This simple practice makes you powerful enough to deal with difficult situations.

The above works best for me, but I would love to know how you manage.

Please post it in the comments and add value to the idea.

P.S. – The mention of science reinstates the logic behind the practice.