Posted on

Be like the moon

 

Why seek attention? It’s simply not worth

Does the moon ever insist for the morning earth?

Why speak and act different, to grab that little span?

Is the night sky less beautiful with its moon-star clan?

Why feel low when the limelight eludes?

Do no moon days not promise a full moon new?

Why spread the bitterness about the illusionary less?

The moon gets unasked attention for its purity and calmness

Will the forced affection make you feel any better?

I asked the moon and it said, “I simply shine, rest doesn’t matter!!”

Posted on

The Manipur incident – An act of riot or an act of ego?

I started my day on a positive note. Mild workout followed by meditating on my manifestations. I thought I had filled my cup for the day and was looking forward to working on my task list. I opened the newspaper and on the front page, I read about the Manipur incident where 3 women were made to parade naked. I read it twice because I could not believe what I read.

I was disappointed and scared all at the same time. I tried reading the Speaking Tree, with a hope that it will discuss some virtue which will take my mind off the heinous incident, but I tried in vain. I did not wish to read any further, I shut the paper.

As I started my chores, I kept thinking that if by mere reading, I am so severely affected, what would be the plight of those who witnessed it and what would be the mental state of the victims who lived that incident.

There were questions in my head. Where are the virtues? Can anyone ever be so wrong for her to go through this? What paralyzed the onlookers? What kept the assaulters going, were they even human?

No, they were not human. Why? Because they did not hold any of the human values. They were not empathetic, not kind, not respectful and most importantly they had a big ego.

Ego is a silent killer and it has the power to steer you away from the path of righteousness. Your ego overshadows all the good that you possibly hold. How? Because in your quest to be right in your judgements and decisions, you resort to inappropriate thinking patters. Your ego makes everyone else look smaller, insignificant and not worthy of winning.

On a daily basis, we experience ego – sometimes we are egoistic and some other times we are negatively affected by the ego of others. But the latter is almost always, clearly visible and criticized. We fail to understand that what is more dangerous is self-ego because it makes us lose control of our mind. What are the early signs of self-ego?

1. You think you are intellectually superior to a large group of people

2. You believe your way of working is the ideal way

3. You don’t appreciate the individual interests of others if they don’t match yours

4. You cannot see others go ahead (small or big win, you feel the same)

5. You easily distance and disconnect from people

These incidents are a call to humanity to put a check on their egos. Knowingly and unknowingly, we tamper the peace of many, by fueling our self-ego. If you think you have even the slightest trace of any of the above 5 thinking patterns, self -realize and control it from growing bigger, else by the time you will act, the damage will be done.

What are your thoughts on the same?

#ego #behuman #behumble #humanity #humanvalues #valuesmatter

Posted on

5 ways how you can be sensitive to people who work for you

Your caliber and personality put you in a position of authority both in personal and professional life. Your virtues build a positive aura around you due to which people value your opinions and respect your decisions. In an organization setup you refer to this behavior as employee loyalty – Loyalty towards the leader and the company.

What are these virtues that make you a better leader/owner/employer? They are truthfulness, dedication and SENSITIVENESS towards people around you. These values are the base of a long-standing resourceful relationship between the higher and the lower strata in the society (based on money and position). Here we will talk about how to develop a nature of being sensitive towards people who work for you.

Value their time

Time is the only thing that we all have in common. The rule is simple – As much as you value your own time, you must also respect the time of others. Keeping your staff or employees waiting creates dissatisfaction among them. Why? Because they have put aside their commitments to be available for you. On the contrary, if you are before time, they feel valued and respect you.

Involve them in decisions

Delegation cannot continue for long. As the employee or staff take the learning curve, they want to actively decide their scope of work. If you do not provide the same, they become resentful or disinterested. These negative values affect the work quality. Regulated authority boosts enthusiasm and nourishes creativity.

Give them space

You need to keep in mind that they have their personal life too. Do not repeat instructions just to clear the clutter in your head. If the other is not in a frame of mind to discuss a topic, postpone the conversation if possible. Do not ignore the other person’s needs.

Recognize their contribution

Recognize their contribution and acknowledge it publicly. A minimum level of motivation keeps their spirit high. You develop humility as you appreciate because you come to understand that you are not the only one responsible for success – it’s a collective effort.

Let go

There are days when your junior or house help or team is in a bitter mood. They are curt or critical or simply off. If it is a one-off case, do not give much value to the incident. Resist the tendency to assume that if you do not put a check it will turn into a habit. Let it go. Why? First to protect your peace and second to give a benefit of doubt to the other. If it happens repetitively, then you need to take charge. 

When we talk about relations, we are very careful while we deal with our superiors. What one needs to work on is good behavior with the ones who are below in the hierarchy. How well you interact with your team and employees is a mark of your good leadership character.

Posted on

Value of trade-offs

A trade-off means – ‘An act of balancing between two opposing situations, qualities or things, both of which you want and need.’ I find this definition to be incomplete because it does not highlight a key feature of a trade-off which is, letting go of some needs and keeping some. Yes, a trade off implies you forego few opportunities and also relationships to make the most of what you decide to keep.

If you were to list the numerous instances where you felt tremendously pressed for energy and time, most of them would fall in the group of professional life v/s personal life. Balancing both is ideal but trade-off is the reality of everyday life.

Advantages of a trade-off over endless juggling

  • You become more passionate about every task that you take up at office or home.
  • You feel powerful because you know you have a choice.
  • You are at peace as you have limited priorities.

Disadvantages of a trade-off

  • You unintentionally limit your scale leading to a limited world view.
  • You need to continuously put effort to build acceptance around your decision.
  • You may often take guilt trips when you see others excelling at something that you have chosen to forego.

How can we make this trade-off easy? Following are 3 points to keep in mind

  1. Make a well evaluated choice which is driven by both facts and feelings. Understand the consequences well because many a times the change is irreversible. For example, you invest your savings in a course abroad, whether you are able to cope up with the vagaries of the new city or not you have to complete the course for better work opportunities.
  2. Know how to handle guilt. Here the best example would be of a working parent. While you meet your office deadlines you miss on your child’s milestones. Pre-empt the situations that will create heaviness in your heart and deal with them head-on. Do not waste time convincing yourself and others every time a new event comes up.
  3. Accept your limitations. While it is good to dream, keep your resources and capabilities in hindsight. Only when you accept your current state can you do a systematic trade off. Random half-hearted bouts will take you nowhere. For instance, your friend did the Everest Base Camp trek which you wanted to do too, but could not do due to a big family event in the same period. Plan the training schedule and take it up the moment you are released off your commitments but for the time being ACCEPT.

Golden rule

The length of the period of a trade-off decides the degree of its reversibility.

Think about it!!!

Following is the link to an article that appeared in the Speaking Tree. It supports my content and is also responsible for the thought of writing on the topic – ‘Value of trade-offs’

https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/blogs/toi-edit-page/heisenberg-principle-and-trade-offs-in-life/

Posted on

Step by step, day by day

Don’t let someone define your goals for you

Don’t believe in the outside world view

Step by step, day by day

Keep going on, make your way

 

Don’t get disheartened when you look around

Don’t be deaf to your inner sound

Step by step, day by day

Keep going on, make your way

 

Don’t fear failures when things go wrong

Don’t worry if progress is taking long

Step by step, day by day

Keep going on, make your way

 

Don’t be insecure when others soar heights

Learn to take inspiration, it makes you feel light

Step by step, day by day

Keep going on, make your way

 

Don’t engage your mind in matters trivial

Think the bigger picture, stay jovial

Step by step, day by day

Keep going on, make your way

Posted on

Achieve your dream of living an ideal day – Part II

As committed in the last blog, this post is about more habits that will help you live an ideal day. Personal development should be a constant endeavor. It is one of the worthiest pursuits for each one of us because we are our most valuable resource. Following are some interesting habits that can make your day more meaningful –

Save energy

Energy is infinite and it is the reason of all activity and existence. Know what depletes your energy and take active steps to tackle it. One of the biggest energy depleters is holding hard feelings against people. All the attention that you give to developing and nurturing a negative feeling towards a person, consumes too much of your emotional and physical energy. It will be impractical to say that be good to all, so what I mean here is if someone does not give a good vibe, disconnect. Stop thinking about that person or situation every time it comes to you. Every single time you discourage that thought, you save some energy.

Time management

This is a topic in itself that we will definitely cover in the posts ahead but in the context of this post, time management is inevitable to get the desired value from your day. As discussed in the post before, an ideal day should have a little development in every form – physical, emotional, social, intellectual, spiritual and professional. Yes, you cannot attend to every parameter each day but each of these should be attended to consistently. This is where your time management skills come to your rescue. Prioritizing, setting up target timelines and working with focus are the key. Adhering to time standards set by self is a rewarding experience.

Go with the flow

This contradicts the habit that we just read about. But the fact remains that as much as you try to be in control of your day there are situations that are beyond your reach. In times like these it is intelligent to go with the flow because resistance makes you feel tired. I do not suggest that you should be over accommodating, but more often than not coming back to the task after an unexpected interruption puts you on track. Only when your mind is stuck on the abruptness of the flow-break, you are paralyzed and you fail to accomplish. Whatever it is, take it in your stride and go with the flow.

What you have achieved in a day gives you partial elation. It is more about how you have achieved it. Let the power of your habits put you in a place that is better than yesterday. Like a master sculptor carve your days carefully and intricately. The simple reason being that days make a week, weeks make a month, months make a year and years make a LIFE.

Posted on

Achieve your dream of living an ideal day – Part I

At the end of the day when you look back what do you find? You find how you were engaged in a mix of many activities – personal, professional, social and others. You identify how you lived moments where you were organized and also your moments of chaos. This takes us to the next question – How to live an ideal day? There is no standard rule book that can define a good day but following are some habits that never go wrong –

Rise early

When you rise early you create a much-needed space for self. You can take up any activity that enriches your being. Reading, exercising, meditating – you can do whatever attracts you. One thing is of utmost importance that the period of early morning is sacred so do not feed yourself with wrong content in any form. Secondly resist the temptation to get drawn into the routine early with the intention of getting extra work done. Strictly reserve that space for self.

Mind your conversations

Converse less about people and more about ideas. Do not engage in depleting conversations that involve, judging, criticizing and complaining. The habit of accepting the choices others make for themselves keeps your mind light and open. Refrain from prolonged discussions about your anxiety with regards to future uncertainties. This lets you be in the present.

Conscious non-doing

By this I mean know where your energy is. There are periods during the day when you don’t feel like working. Conscious non -doing is when you don’t doom scroll or oversleep, rather you take an active break. An active break means diverting your mind towards your hobbies or giving time to learning about new things of your interest. You may choose to spend time with family or travel as well. The guiding sense should be an awareness that you have paused to reconnect and it is not an abrupt stop.

If you ponder a little you would know that non-conscious non-doing, consumes most of your productive day. Also, the first two habits are easy to imbibe and monitor but, the third habit is not apparently visible. More on this will come as a follow- on post in this week. Do share your thoughts on the idea of ‘An Ideal Day.’